VISIONAIRES
When to let go of hope ???
It was the autumn of 2000..both my sisters had moved to Nepal from my home town in the state of West Bengal to work as teachers.
it was a first parting in the family and very difficult..lots of tears shed..my brother inconsolable.
With time though ,emotions settled down.And the next time I met my elder sister Shweta ,it was spring..she was in love with a colleague.
Love really makes the world go around and I was happy to see her glow..I still distinctly remember my first impresion of her man..he was tall, some 6 feet 2 inches, thin ,content and reserved.A senior science teacher I would call him Jha sir (so much so even after he tied the knot with my sister and became a part of the family..he was never Sanjay or Jijaji for us--he would still be Jha sir)
Breaking the caste barriers in India is not always the easiest job..We are Nepalese snd Jha Sir is from Bihar. After months of pacifying his nerves, my father, a very rigid man , eventually gave his consent to the wedding and blessed the couple..
Time moved on and we had our little bundle of joy -my niece Medha who is 6 today....everything seemed perfect till two years back when life took a turn..Jha sir was detected with brain tumor..and thereon started his and our dates with hospitals and medicos..
Operated upon and removed, but the tumor was malignant.It was cancer of the grade 4 type..everywhere the words were the same.."do not expect a miracle..we can only prolong not cure.."
Cancer just does'nt kill...it takes away your dreams.One wouldn't curse even the worst of enemy with this trauma.
Two long years have passed by..endless visits to hospitals ..two difficult brain surguries..never ending drugs and an emotional long drawn battle for survival..what remains of Jha Sir today is his fragile physical self ,but still a smile on his face.its this smile which is my sister's strength..
but now with the malignancy spreading very fast..and no option of surgery left..it was time to take a call...doctors said it is a matter of weeks...
it was a dilemma..should we continue with the very high end drugs that would keep him alive,for few more months, but crippled and in bed ...or let him spend his time in peace..should we keep moving him from one city to the other in his fragile state to search for the unanswered.
after all what is living all about? is it a mere existence where you breathe? is it being on medicines that make your heart beat but take your soul away and leave you in unbearable pain? For all the past months, my sister endlessly fought against all odds to snatch every single possible moment that she could spend with her husband, that medha could spend with her father..
but today there is a strange emptiness in her eyes..perhaps a question ...to wait for her silent prayers getting answered ,a miracle to happen....or let go off hope.
it was a first parting in the family and very difficult..lots of tears shed..my brother inconsolable.
With time though ,emotions settled down.And the next time I met my elder sister Shweta ,it was spring..she was in love with a colleague.
Love really makes the world go around and I was happy to see her glow..I still distinctly remember my first impresion of her man..he was tall, some 6 feet 2 inches, thin ,content and reserved.A senior science teacher I would call him Jha sir (so much so even after he tied the knot with my sister and became a part of the family..he was never Sanjay or Jijaji for us--he would still be Jha sir)
Breaking the caste barriers in India is not always the easiest job..We are Nepalese snd Jha Sir is from Bihar. After months of pacifying his nerves, my father, a very rigid man , eventually gave his consent to the wedding and blessed the couple..
Time moved on and we had our little bundle of joy -my niece Medha who is 6 today....everything seemed perfect till two years back when life took a turn..Jha sir was detected with brain tumor..and thereon started his and our dates with hospitals and medicos..
Operated upon and removed, but the tumor was malignant.It was cancer of the grade 4 type..everywhere the words were the same.."do not expect a miracle..we can only prolong not cure.."
Cancer just does'nt kill...it takes away your dreams.One wouldn't curse even the worst of enemy with this trauma.
Two long years have passed by..endless visits to hospitals ..two difficult brain surguries..never ending drugs and an emotional long drawn battle for survival..what remains of Jha Sir today is his fragile physical self ,but still a smile on his face.its this smile which is my sister's strength..
but now with the malignancy spreading very fast..and no option of surgery left..it was time to take a call...doctors said it is a matter of weeks...
it was a dilemma..should we continue with the very high end drugs that would keep him alive,for few more months, but crippled and in bed ...or let him spend his time in peace..should we keep moving him from one city to the other in his fragile state to search for the unanswered.
after all what is living all about? is it a mere existence where you breathe? is it being on medicines that make your heart beat but take your soul away and leave you in unbearable pain? For all the past months, my sister endlessly fought against all odds to snatch every single possible moment that she could spend with her husband, that medha could spend with her father..
but today there is a strange emptiness in her eyes..perhaps a question ...to wait for her silent prayers getting answered ,a miracle to happen....or let go off hope.
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